How To Become Famous For 15 minutes: Your Reality Show Primer

Joshua here, from Reality Show Rambles…

How big of a reality show fan are you?

Do you envy the stars on reality tv? Do you want to become the next Lacey or Tanisha?  Do you want to audition for Randy, Paula and Simon?

Do you want YOUR very own 15-minutes of fame?  Here is our nitty-gritty how-to guide that will help you choose the type of reality show you’d be best suited for.

Andy Warhol coined the phrase “15-minutes of fame.”  Little did he know just how easy it would be for us all to aquire it.  Becoming the next reality show star can be a sure way to grab your 15-minutes (perhaps 16-18 if you play your cards right, but never more than 20).

Before running out and auditioning for the next reality show that comes strolling through your town, let us together figure out which type of reality show you’d be best suited for.

Reality shows can be broken down into three different categories.

1. Romance, or ‘Finding Love’ shows
2. Talent shows
3. Fly-On-The-Wall, or The Train Wreck shows

Popular Shows in the Finding Love Category:

• The Bachelor
• Rock Of Love with Bret Michaels
• Momma’s Boys

Popular Shows in the Talent Show Category:

• American Idol
• America’s Got Talent
• America’s Next Top Model

(Contrary to this example, the word ‘America’ need not be in the show’s title for eligibility into the Talent Show category.)

Popular Shows in the Fly-On-The-Wall/Train Wreck Category:

• Bad Girls Club
• Keeping Up with the Kardashians
• The Girls Next Door

Which Reality Show Is Right For You?

Finding Love Format

In the Finding Love category, the format usually includes an elimination, a ceremony if you will.  Each week, a gaggle of guys or girls will party it up with an unlimited supply of alcohol and try to impress the head honcho through a series of, uh, competitions.  Survival of the fittest (or bitchiest), perhaps.

During the elimination, you are lined up and basically dissected to the point of tears until you are asked to leave.  If you are the last person standing at season’s end, you win*.

*Note: Be careful when becoming part of a ‘finding love’ show. It very well may result in a marriage between you and the person who chooses you.  (Read contracts carefully.)

This type of show is perfect for:

If your main talent is on the social, personality and good looks side, the find love shows are the way to go. Here, you’ll be able to let your true self shine while partying endlessly and vying for that special strangers heart.

Talent Show Format

If you have some sort of legitimate talent (singing, dancing, ventriloquism), the Talent Show category may be more your thing.  The show floats across the nation and holds auditions searching for the next big star.  This could be you!

It may be wise to get a true grasp on just how talented you actually are before running out to audition.  We all find high amusement in the talent auditions that are clearly not for real and only there for comic relief.  The judges know it, the contestant knows it and we know it.

However, I’m amazed at how often a contestant is torn apart by the judges and genuine tears start to form.  Sadly, the contestant did not realize they were not talented.  We knew instantly yet they were never told.  Don’t let this be you.

So a word to the wise: Get a stranger’s opinion regarding your talent.  A best friend or relative will only lie to you.  Stop a stranger on the street, display your talent and see what they think.  This will only save you tons of grief down the road.

This type of show is perfect for:

If you have talent, and I mean truly bonafide and accounted for talent, you could be perfect for the talent show category.  You’ll also need a keen eye to know when the show is laughing AT and no longer WITH you.

Train Wreck Show Format

With the train wreck show, no one gets eliminated or asked to leave (unless they start a cat fight and begin beating the crap out of you).  These shows are more of a fly-on-the-wall approach. We tune in to watch either a famous family go about their ‘usual’ business (The Osbournes, Hogans, Kardashians to name a few) or we watch attractive, relatively unknowns make fools of themselves (think Bad Girls Club).

I say ‘relatively unknowns’ because some of the guys and gals on these shows (more often than not, the gals) are models or amateur models, who are known in some circles for, er, baring their souls.  If you have this history, your chances of appearing on these shows will be significantly higher.

This type of show is perfect for:

The exibitionist, the camera whore or simply the regular whore.  The train wreck shows will require plenty of antics on your part to keep the show interesting.  Since there are no competitions, we will tune in to watch you drink a lot, say plenty of foolish things, back stab a bit and in 6-8 weeks, disappear from our minds.

Go make Warhol proud and take your 15-minutes

So what are you waiting for?  Decide on which type of reality show to sell your soul to so we can all tune in and forget about our troubles for a bit.  We sincerely thank you for it, since we don’t have the courage, balls or desire to do so ourselves.

If this guide has been helpful, won’t you please consider spreading the word to other reality show fanatics.

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